Oh, the mamma love just keeps pouring in.
This mamma in particular has been so good to me. This girl is one of my dearest and closest friends; we've seen each other through a lot of good and been there through the inevitable heartbreak that life often brings. We've pranked one another, dug one another out of the snow to get to work, made calls in the middle of the night, and I feel as close to her today as I did when we lived only a few miles apart. She's a gem of a soul and meant to be a mamma.
In just a few short days, she will be welcoming Sweet Baby #2 and I know without a doubt that her children are blessed to have her as their mother.
I love you to the ends of the Earth, Ash, and I am so, so happy you shared today. Thank you for your love, your support, and your honesty.
Photos & Text by Ashlee
My letter to Kinlee:
Boo Bear...that's what your daddy nicknamed you while you were in my tummy.
I feel like I have waited for you my whole life. Before you were conceived I wrote your name over and over like a little girl in love, doodling the name of the one she liked. I was in love with you even before I met you. I dreamt of you, wanted for you, and simply prayed every day that it would come true. Before you, your daddy and I lost a baby very early. I never knew why and always questioned it....until YOU! I realized exactly why I had to wait.
The day I saw your beautiful face was no doubt the best day of my life. You woke me up from a deep sleep of my past. A past I ran so hard from, but has made me who I am today. I realized why I was put on this earth; it was to be your mommy. The thought of raising you even though I wanted you in my life, terrified me. You were so perfect, so tiny. Helpless and totally dependent on me. I went from wanting to be a mommy to actually being one. I didn't know what to do and I wondered if I would get the motherly instinct everyone always spoke of.
Your grandma, the one who adopted me, has a heart of gold and is truly amazing, but the one who brought me into this world hurt me in so many ways. I grew up thinking, "She is my mom, she is supposed to protect me." I vowed to myself right then and there if I were ever blessed with a child of my own I would be the best mom I could be. I would like to think I am the perfect mom for you. You were made for me. You snuggled in from the moment we first met and were a perfect fit. I wanted to surround you with unconditional love and for you to grow up knowing how much you are loved and valued as a person. Momma loves you, Boo Bear!!! You have the most beautiful heart. Promise me to always see good in the world...it is out there. Thanks for making me a mommy!
Sites I Dig
The Road is Home
The Seed & Plate
Sharon Covert Photography
The Define School
The Noisy Plume
Sarah Gee Photography
Fox & Owl Studio
The Stork and The Beanstalk
Mellow Yellow Photography
A Simple Little Journal
What I've Been Reading
The Girls by Emma Cline
A Land More Kind Than Home by Wiley Cash
Dark Places by Gillian Flynn
Never Broken by Jewel
Hold Still by Sally Mann