A Guest Blogger Series
I have been struggling this morning to try and find the words that will express how honored I am by today's Mamma Anthology. Nothing touches my heart more than another person's honest, beautiful truth. Their experience - spoken from a place of willingness, reflection - and sometimes - a bit of vulnerability. Those stories are the ones that affect me most. And this story - this Love Note from a Mamma to her Little Owl - moved me so.
Tianna has been in my life a long time and our journeys have overlapped one another's for many years. Although we live in completely different states now, she has been wonderfully supportive and encouraging in a myriad of ways. She is the kind of soul that inspires goodness. And calm. A person that keeps my eyes open to what's important. I am fortunate that our paths continue to cross and Tianna, I want you to know how profoundly your words affected me - the truth spoken in them, the kindness, the honesty. So very important and so very beautiful.
Thank you, friend.
Photos & Text by Tianna
I want to express thanks to the beautiful soul that pours her essence into this blog. I admire her remarkable spirit and beauty both inward and outward. She never ceases to encourage, reassure, and inspire those around her. There are many gifts in life for which I am thankful for – she is one of them. I couldn't have kept my sanity without the blessing of strong women like her in my life holding me together. Thank you.
When you were still comfortably nestled in my tummy, people said things to me like, “Your whole world is going to change the instant you hold your baby in your arms,” and “You’re going to feel more love for your child than you ever thought yourself capable of.” And they were right. But what they didn’t say and couldn't have prepared me for was the paralyzing, terrifying, exhausting uncertainty I felt from the moment you were born until you had survived under my inexperienced care for a few months. I knew I loved you from the moment I met you, but I was not able to give in to that immense, life-changing love for the fear that something might happen to you in your sleep. Or while you were awake. Is it possible to be too rough while changing your clothes and cause permanent damage? What if I get the diaper too tight and cut off circulation? All of these fears (and many more) ruled my every thought and waking moment. Somehow we both survived those distressing times and you grew sturdier as I became more comfortable in my new Mommy shoes.
In your short time on this Earth you have taught me truly unconditional love. Because of your influence I feel compassion and a deeper connection with people I encounter and our Savior above. I am learning a whole new love language through you. For every time I harshly criticize my reflection in the mirror, there you are with a huge, happiest-place-in-the-world grin to bury yourself in my much fluffier physique. You allow me to not only accept my fluff, but appreciate it because you love it so. Why is it that the things I would change about myself are some of the things I love so dearly about you, Little Owl? Your ample tummy, supple cheeks, and extra layer of chin are constant sources of joy each day (and some of my favorite places to plant kisses). Maybe I don’t want to change my own so much after all.
I watch with joy in my heart as you grow, and as your love for all things “outside” grows. I look forward to cultivating that love as the spring weather warms and we venture outdoors to discover the fascinating creation awaiting us.
With one of Dad’s old paint stirring sticks in one hand and Mom’s finger in the other hand, I gleefully watch as you set out to explore the world outside of your nest with fierce determination.
Your Dad and I are endlessly amused by your curious nature.
As you journey through life may you always know the way back to the safety of your nest, Little Owl.
Thankfully you enjoy eating, or should I call it Dinner Theater? Every meal is an opportunity to “put on a show.”
Rest well, Little Owl. Rest well.
I enjoyed the treasured moments of childhood spent in the wilderness of a small town in the Ozarks, but I’m enjoying your childhood so much more Little Owl.
Sites I Dig
The Road is Home
The Seed & Plate
Sharon Covert Photography
The Define School
The Noisy Plume
Sarah Gee Photography
Fox & Owl Studio
The Stork and The Beanstalk
Mellow Yellow Photography
A Simple Little Journal
What I've Been Reading
The Girls by Emma Cline
A Land More Kind Than Home by Wiley Cash
Dark Places by Gillian Flynn
Never Broken by Jewel
Hold Still by Sally Mann